Monday, January 31, 2011

A unique relationship...

It's a very unique relationship.  A mother-in-law.  We all know the stories - mostly bad.  The mother-in-law/daughter-in-law relationship that isn't what it should be.  And I'm trying to figure out why.

There's the kindly suggestions that are taken as 'meddling'.  There's the mother wanting to be with or speak to her son and it is seen as a 'threat'.  There's tips given about the children since they have experience under their belt and that's taken as being 'bossy'.  There's the ones that stop in at any moment's notice and it comes off as 'nosy'.  And so it goes...

But I want to just say how I feel.  I have a wonderful mother-in-law.  She went from a virtual stranger to a very dear lady that I feel moved to call when something goes good or bad in our life.  She doesn't meddle.  She doesn't feel like a threat.  She isn't bossy.  And she isn't nosy.

She loves her son.  And I love him too.  And isn't that the very reason why we should be close?  She loves our children equally.  And I do too.  And isn't that the very reason why we should be close?  And I know she loves me and I also love her.  I think time draws people together.  Loving the same people.  And going through some tough experiences.  And sharing our lives.

Some day if I live long enough, I will also be a mother-in-law if one or more of our children choose to marry.  I hope I don't meddle.  I hope I don't threat.  I hope I'm not bossy.  I hope to not be nosy.  I've got a good example.  And for that and for her... I'm thankful.

She probably won't be overjoyed I wrote these kind things about her because, well, that's not the kind of person she is.  She's reserved.  She's humble.  And not one to look for limelight. But on this, her birthday, I just wanted her to know that we are thankful for her and her good example.

Happy Birthday to you Mom D!


  1. Isn't it wonderful when we have a mother-in-law that is a "MOM"?!

  2. I'd like to print this post off/save it to my hard-drive and send it off to newly weds... in fact, I'd like to send it off to just about everyone I know. I have a feeling you and Mom D are both pretty special people. Happy Birthday to her!!

  3. I recall one other sweet post you did for your MIL, and I remember thinking..."that's" how it is suppose to be. I often even think of Ruth and Naomi as examples of that relationship. I hope that I can strive to be just like this too. I am sure she feels just as lucky and you do. Happy Birthday to her!

  4. That is very lovely put, and I feel very blessed, I have a mother in law very much like that too. It's now my turn to carry on the spirit of a good mother in law.